Our Wedding by the Sea

Not officially because Chris still doesn't have a job, which means I'm paying all the bills and have zero cash to put a deposit down.  But still, we found the place we're going to get married!

We had a walk-through today and I loved it.  It's bigger than the Clubhouse, which is a plus.  It also has hardwood floors (we wouldn't need to rent a dance floor!) and a stage (for the DJ).  There are three double doors that face the beach and we were thinking we could open them for a fresh sea breeze.  Here are some of the pictures I took:

I leave for my craptastic job in 40 minutes, work till close, then have off the next three days.  Tomorrow we're headed to north Jersey for a close friend's wedding, then leaving from there for the shore.

I've been in contact with the beach venue from my last post and am trying to schedule a walk-through with the event coordinator.  She said that the only date booked for August/September/October 2012 is August 11th, so we still have our choice of basically any date we want.  I'm pretty sure we're sold on Sept. 22nd.

Anyway, I called the coordinator and left her a message today.  She emailed me last night saying that she was available Sunday or Monday afternoon, so I'm hoping that she gets back to me in time to see the place.  She's kinda hard to get a hold of.

I'm just so excited to finally see the inside and really determine what we're going to do.  Of course both sets of moms will want to see the place, but basically everyone is telling us we should do it there because the beach is so us.  I can't wait :)

It has been my dream- my entire life- to be married on the beach.  I always tell Chris that I'm happiest when I'm down the shore with my toes in the sand, sea breeze running through my hair.  I just have this amazingly calm, inner happiness when I'm at the ocean.  I can't explain it, but trust me it's stupendous.

I'd given up on getting married at the beach.  The only way I could afford a seaside reception would be in a different country (ie- Mexico), which was a plan that fell through when I was reminded how many of our friends and family wouldn't come because of the expense to them.  My heart was broken, I did lots of research, and ended up deciding to look at places closer to home: in land-locked Pennsylvania.

While we were in Cape May this past weekend, I couldn't ignore it anymore.  I couldn't shake the feeling that we were meant to be married on the beach.  It's such a HUGE part of who we are: we started in Cape May, he told me he loved me the first time in Cape May, etc. etc. etc.  I felt like I had to make it work- even if it meant saving every single penny I made (outside of paying the bills) for the next year).  So I asked Chris if we could drive by a venue I'd heard about online.  I had actually emailed the place several times back when we first got engaged, but I figured we couldn't swing it and just forgot about it.  In all honestly, I don't know why I did that.  The place is super affordable and RIGHT on the beach- like, walk out the door, walk 10 feet, and BAM! sand dunes.

So we drive north of Cape May to Stone Harbor to check the place out.  And I fall in love.  Not so much with the venue itself- which is pretty plain and kind of boring, lending itself beautifully to my creative touch- but with its location.  Right beside the building are sand dunes...

...meaning that THIS could be my aisle.  Looking at it makes me want to cry.  No, really.  I get tears in my eyes and get all emotional.  THAT is the way I'm supposed to see my husband-to-be.  I want him waiting at the end with the ocean as a backdrop.  We're not meant to be married on some soccer field.  This is just so absolutely us.

We didn't get to tour the venue because it was a spur of the moment thing on a Sunday afternoon.  No one was there and the doors were locked, but I did peak in the windows and it's about the same size as the Clubhouse (maybe a little bigger), with lots of natural light, high ceilings, and a stage that I have NO idea what I'm going to do with.

After talking it over, discussing the pro's and con's, and readjusting our budget, we are pretty sure this is the way we're going to go with our wedding.  I've already emailed for more information, received it, and am waiting to hear about their availability for 2012.

One of the only downsides is that we'll probably change our date to September 2012 (from August 18).  Cape May is REALLY hot in the summer and many hotels have a three-night minimum (which would be really inconvenient for our guests).  In September, the weather is cooler (but not cold) and after Labor Day the season is over so hotels are much more lax (and more affordable!)  We are hoping for September 22, because we are in a wedding for Chris' best friend on the 8th.  We want them to be able to enjoy their honeymoon instead of having to stick around for our wedding the next week, and Kyle is in our wedding too, so we really want him there.  The 22nd is also Chris' parent's anniversary, so it'd be cool to do something for them on our wedding day, too.

I have just returned from a very entertaining and equally interesting weekend in Cape May with FI and his family.  His aunt turns 60 today and the family threw her a huge party on Saturday.

Sitting with Chris' dad (Doug) and his brothers, Doug suddenly realizes that all the Neal's are together and that they should do the black bean test.  Chris and his brothers have no idea what he's talking about, but it's soon explained.  In order to become a part of the "family," one must pass the black bean test.

What is the black bean test, you ask?  It's a vote.  The family actually votes on whether or not you can be a part of the family.  No, really.  They all get some beans- or balls?- and a red marker and a black marker.  Then they mark the bean- red if I can be a member and black if I can't.  They put them in a bucket and then I pull each one out with everyone watching and if I get a black one, I can't be in the family.  This doesn't mean we can't be married- it just means I'm not a true member.

Only one person has ever gotten a black bean: Vicki's ex-husband.

So now I'm nervous and kind of freaking out that I'm going to get a black bean.  I don't see why I would.  I'  But still... wouldn't it suck if someone gave me a black bean?

Nervous....

So I have a new obsession.  Emmy Shoes.

And these, my absolute favorite:

I WILL wear them on my wedding day.  Well, maybe not THOSE by Emmy herself, I mean.  But my own version that will likely cost me less than the almost $900US they would cost me to buy them.  I'm currently on a wild hunt for a pair of white pumps with a diagonal strap.  If I can't find them, I'm buying a pair of white pumps (maybe in satin, to feel more bridal) and having a cobbler attach a strap.  Affixing a feather, attaching a charming applique and voila!  Let's hope this turns out for the best because the moment I saw these bad boys I knew I must have them...

Today has been wonderful so far.  Fi and I slept in until noon.  I got a call from my bestie (and MOH) down in Georgia saying that she got a teaching job.  And we finalized our guest list.

I was feeling pretty uneven to start.  We were aiming to invite 90 people, since our probable venue only holds 80.  My family had 20 people, Chris' had 32, and we had 36 friends.  With some rearranging, my family now has 30 people (I get to invite my cousins!  Yay!), Chris still has 32, and we're inviting 30 friends.  That means we're inviting 92 (not 90) people, but we think it will all work out.  Thank God we have all the same friends- that could have been a nightmare.

It's so nice to feel like *something* is done.  I feel like so much is up in the air or in progress, so it's great to have something in concrete.  Our first big fat check.  Now, if only we could find a venue and nail down our date...

I've been making paper flowers like crazy.  After a burn on the glue gun last night, I stopped.  But I fully plan to have Fi cut more paper so I can keep going when I get home from work tonight.

So I'm diving head-first into my DIY projects.  Last night I cut 60 pieces of paper for my second tissue paper pom, and then FI made my life easier and cut 40 more for me today.  I only have a traditional paper cutter, not a sliding one, so it doesn't work for cutting the tissue paper.  Chris, however, is smart and figured out a way to cut it a lot faster than I can.  So he's now in charge of cutting, and I'm in charge of folding, wire wrapping, cutting, fluffing, and gluing onto the styrofoam ball.  Yay.  I'm currently at FMIL's house because they are in Vegas and we're watching the dogs.  They come home tonite after midnight, so I have plenty of time to twist up some flowers.

Yesterday I tried one last time to twist a "Mrs. Neal" dress hanger and I guess the third time was a charm!  I was about to give up and write "I do" or "bride," but I'm glad I put one last effort into my new last name.  Now I just need to paint the hanger chocolate (the maple is far too light), have FI drill holes for the wire to go into, and add a blue bow.

On other news... I am starting to panic.  It's already July and we still don't have a venue for our reception OR for our ceremony.  Our budget is just so seriously limited and we live in the most expensive place in America to have a wedding... so it's killing me.  I'm hoping to have somewhere ASAP so I can relax.  I swear, once we have a place and a date set in stone, I will feel so much better.  I feel like I'm making things for something that's not really going to happen haha.  I still picture the Clubhouse every time I think about our wedding.  I might just have to get creative with the guest list to make it work.  We shall see.

Well, back to folding and twisting tissue paper flowers.  Such is life for a DIY bride.

We are having the hardest time nailing down our wedding theme.  We know we want it to feel laid back, but still like a wedding.  It's going to be a summer wedding- outdoor ceremony and either indoor reception or tent reception.  We thought about having a "summer night" theme, but I don't want to go crazy with stars and moons.  So I'm thinking about just having a summer theme.  You know, brainstorming all the things I think of when I think about summer and taking out all the ones that aren't really weddingy or coming up with a way to make them weddingy.

Here are some of the things I've come up with so far:
-starry skies
-popsicles & snow cones
-sparklers and fireworks
-cocktails
-fruity sodas (I never drink soda, but for some reason in the summer I crave Code Red and Orange Fanta)
-sundresses
-lightening bugs
-candles
-porch lights (like the little red, orange, and yellow lights that people hang for barbecues)
-flip flops
-flowers
-grass between your toes
-bon fires
-honeysuckle & tiger lilies (they're all over the place in our area)
-fairs/block parties
-fresh fruit (watermelon, blackberries, and cherries especially)
-food on the grill

The list goes on and on...  The problem is- can I keep this cohesive enough?  Do I need a more solid plan, or can I reach deep inside and muster up enough creativity to make this all flow?